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Holding on to less, becoming more

Have you ever been driving down the road and inside you feel unsettled? As you drive you begin to realize that you don't even like the music you are listening to, you really don't even like the radio station that you are on. I do this all the time! It's like a weird silent tolerance to things we don't have to put up with simply because it's convenient.

I've realized lately that I waste a lot of energy on things I don't care about as well as things that I would rather go without. Back to the radio example, the other day as I drove to work I switched between channels not liking any of the songs that were playing after a lengthy battle of going back and forth between my top 4 saved stations I finally turned the radio off. The remainder of my commute was reflective and I was able to think clearer. Why didn't I do this from the beginning? Probably because I have trained my brain to seek out distraction. Our culture has trained most of us to seek out distractions.

"Your results are the product of either personal focus or personal distraction. The choice is yours." ~John Di Lemme

The results of my life show that I live in a lukewarm setting for focus and distraction, I set apart time daily for focus but I also live a great majority of my day being open to distraction. This habit I have created for myself keeps me entertained but it also keeps me from accomplishing my greatest dreams. 

In an article called Understanding Decision Fatigue Healthline.com discussed the reason we as a society experience so much fatigue. It all boils down to have so many options and so many choices that it burns us out.

Classic signs of decision fatigue include: (list taken from Healthline.com)
Procrastination. “I’ll tackle this later.”
Impulsivity. “Eeny, meeny, miny, moe…”
Avoidance. “I can’t deal with this right now.”
Indecision. “When in doubt, I just say ‘no.'”

How many of us go through this on a regular basis, so overwhelmed with what is in front of us that we just tell ourselves that we will deal with it later, or that we just shut down an idea completely because we are too tired to think about it. Let me tell you, my friend, this will get in the way of some of your biggest opportunities. We are waisted all our energy on things that aren't as important and shutting down ideas that could inspire us and take us places. Did you know that procrastination can lead to elevated anxiety and depression? True Story, it can also lead to irritability, chronic headaches, and even digestive issues. Heartburn can be stress-related, migraines can be stress-related, rashes? Stress-related. So what can we do about it?

First, we need to simplify the things in our lives that will not be life-changing. Last year I started off with my wardrobe. Do you ever have days when you try on every outfit in your closet and every possible combination and hate everything? This outfit doesn't hide your bloated tummy from your stress eating the night before. This one accents your skin wrong because your skin has tanned somewhat during the summer. So what did I do?

Last year I got rid of a lot of my clothes that I felt like I was sitting on the fence about, I had a lot that I liked the concept behind the outfit but it didn't suit me. I went on an inexpensive site Jane.com and bought some simple tops that I could mix and match with jeans, leggings, flats, or boots shirts that were popular and came in many different colors. Do I have a lot of the same top? You bet I do but it has cut a 50-minute process into a 10-minute process. It's pretty simple I pick a top color, decide whether I want to wear it with jeans or leggings if I wear it with leggings than I know boots will be my footwear choice. If I choose jeans I can pick a pair of flats to go with the outfit. It's a simple routine that has saved me 40 minutes a day, that's 40 minutes I can now use somewhere else in my day.

What we wear often is not a life-changing decision, but we treat it as if it is. 

Another thing I am finding is that I can predetermine what I will listen to in my car, I may not really waste time switching stations but I do waste energy and focus. Depending on what I need that day I do better if I pick a podcast or Pandora station to listen to before I start my commute. This way my commute is spent pumping me up and prepping emotionally for my day at work.

Often times it isn't our outfit or our radio station that impacts our lives and influencing where we are going, it is our energy and our confidence in what we want in our lives. Everyone's journey is different but we all have to make decisions to make it through life, its time to start focusing our time and energy on the things that matter most.

“Starve your distractions, feed your focus.” Jay Shetty

Lamothe, C. (2019). Understating Decision Fatigue. Retrieved from https://www.healthline.com/health/decision-fatigue#signs

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