Skip to main content

give to you

This is going to be short, it's been a long day and it's late, my thoughts have been running circles in my head. I've been a mess all weekend running in circles trying to keep myself and everything around me running smoothly. Some times it takes a lot of effort to make life seem so well put together when inside there's such a mess. I'm a stress case I over analyze anything and everything that could possible be over analyzed, I worry that if I don't think of something no one else will either, which is sad. And I stress over every fine tuned little detail, which sometimes drives me crazy.
But what I have realized this weekend is that when you have given and given and you have nothing left to give it probably means that you need to give something to yourself, and usually that thing is either love or forgiveness. Forgive who you have been in the past, and love for who you are now and who you can be in your future. If you can't learn to forgive who you have been, it makes loving who you are and who you can be very difficult.
Just like in a marriage these two concepts will keep you and your spouse United and on the same team, in life these two concepts will keep you together, and willing to fight for yourself, no matter how messy you are inside.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Judgemental Driving

So this may be a little known fact about me, but I have road rage. It's not really extreme but I have no patience with other drivers and I often catch myself judging other drivers over simple things. Such as what lane of traffic they are in, or which lane they decide to turn into. It's probably not super apparent, but something that if you drove with me often (which no one does by the way) you would probably notice. Tonight was a good example of this problem of mine, there was a car in front of me that turned into a turning lane to a road that in my mind seems to lead no where. As I watched this car I mumbled under my breath something about "Do you even know where you are going, or are you lost? Cause that kind of goes no where important." Than I thought about it for a second and realized, maybe their home is on that road, maybe they are going to visit a loved one. Maybe they are headed to a best friends house, in all of those cases it would be a road to somewhere im...

Warmth and Love

The past few days it has really hit me how much grief and loss affect each of us in our lives. No matter how much those around us seem to have it all together there is a great chance there is something that they are grieving in their life. In September my family almost lost my mom, she has always struggled with kidney stones and due to some oversight she ended up in the ICU with sepsis. For days I waited at home unable to do anything to help feeling almost crippled by the pain and fear that I might lose her. One night I went up and laid on her bed and wound up a music box and cried. I didn't want my younger brothers to see me completely fall apart so I stayed in my parents room until I had nothing left to cry. My mom recovered and was able to return home, but even now 5 months later there are moments I can still see that she is still healing from the experience. I know looking inward on my heart that I sometimes feel flashes of the fear creep back in, and that in my ow...

it's simple

I'm a mess sometimes, actually it's not just me, it's life. Life is messy, it's emotional, and because we go so much by emotion, logic flees the scene. Sometimes that what makes things messy is when we either use our head or our heart, and somehow when I start using both of them life gets a little less messy and a bit more sensical (if that's even a word, it is now, I'm running with it) its the balance of your head and heart that bring things together. I don't really ever listen to me own advice, like ever. I am fantastic at giving great advice, I think I would make a fabulous relationship advisor, however it has completely escaped on how to make my own relationships flourish. However I have gotten very good at something else, breathing (yup that is my secret, the cat is out of the bag) breathing. When nothing else makes ensemble and everything is falling apart, breathing makes a hug difference, we'll it better, without it we would die, so yeah I would ...